The Together playlist is the songs that meant so much to Maureen and me about our relationship. When I hear these now, I cry a lot, but it’s a good cry.

This is a Spotify playlist, available here.

They Were You

Both of us loved The Fantasticks. We saw it live many times. At the Sullivan Street Theater in New York, at the Mineola Playhouse, and elsewhere.

They Were You means to me how Maureen opened my whole world. She changed my perspective, starting with how I saw her. Then expanding that perspective to everything.

‘Til There Was You

‘Til There Was You from The Music Man is similar to They Were You. This song reminds me how much my life changed because we were together.

Something Wonderful

Something Wonderful from The King And I was a pivotal song in our relationship. We saw it live (with Yul Brynner as the King!) at the Mineola Playhouse in Mineola. Unknown to me, Maureen was fed up with my emotional distance and introversion. While my intellectual IQ was high, my emotional IQ was very low. We had been dating for several months and I had never expressed to Maureen how I felt about her. She decided that she needed to find someone who would love her. She decided she would break up with me after the play.

In Something Wonderful, Anna sings about her relationship with the King. She recognizes that he isn’t all she would want but she also recognizes the spark of a better man inside the King. Maureen listened and decided maybe I could get another chance to do “something wonderful” in our relationship. She saw me as a work in progress.

We usually ended our dates by walking around her neighborhood, talking and enjoying our time together. That night, I knew I needed to tell Maureen that I loved her. As an introverted 16–year–old male, I was terrified of expressing my personal feelings. As we walked along, I finally blurted out “I love you, Barbara.” !!! (Barbara was another young woman I dated.)

Wow! A total disaster! However, as I apologized and tried to fix my error, Maureen was pleased and amused. Like the King, I had done something wonderful, however imperfect. She accepted my apologies and took my meaning rather than my words.

In my mind, later, I think she was just happy that I could express a personal emotion. She had no fear that she couldn’t redirect my target of love if necessary!

Whenever I hear this song I cry for thinking of how close I came to total disaster in my life!

I’ll Never Find Another You

I’ll Never Find Another You was one of the theme songs for Marriage Encounter. We played it ME weekends and ME events. It reminded us of the precious gift we had in each other. There was no point in looking for better when we had the best. We just needed to work at bringing out the best qualities of our relationship.

It was on our first Marriage Encounter weekend in June 1973 that I realized that Maureen loved me unconditionally. While I knew she didn’t agree with everything I did, she loved me as a person, just as I was. She wanted me to improve for my sake as well as for our relationship. My belief in Maureen’s unconditional love gave me the confidence to believe that God’s love is also unconditional. If Maureen could do that, how hard would it be for God?

The Impossible Dream

The Impossible Dream from The Man of La Mancha was another theme song of Marriage Encounter. Along with another song from the play, Dulcinea, it was used in several talks to help us see how we could see each other differently and work to reestablish the love we had in our romance stage of relationship.

The Impossible Dream reminds me that despite how life looks at any one time, we can do better. While the ideal may not be fully attainable, the quest towards the ideal is worth the effort.

One Hand, One Heart

One Hand, One Heart from West Side Story mirrors our vows to each other. Where there were two individuals, now there would be two individual components as part of a relationship with each other and with God. We tried to love as one hand and one heart.

In the final years of Maureen’s illness, the phrase “even death won’t part us” became especially meaningful.

Bridge Over Troubled Water

Bridge Over Troubled Water from Paul Simon and Arthur Garfunckel reminded us of how we needed each other in the trying times of life. These were the “for worse” parts of our lives. We pledged that we would always be there for each other, no matter what the world was throwing at us. Stormy times were easier because we always had each other as that bridge over troubled waters.

Never My Love

Never My Love from the Association was important as a pledge that we were always there for each other. Despite the trials, we were not abandoning the other. During Maureen’s final illness, she was sometimes upset at how the care she needed was such a burden on me. I would sing a few lines from this song to her to remind her that I wasn’t going anywhere.

Everything I Own

Everything I Own became important to me after Maureen passed on to Jesus. Even though the song references the death of the songwriter’s father, it expresses how I feel about Maureen. I would give everything to have her back again.

And So It Goes (Instrumental)

And So It Goes by Billy Joel has lyrics about a broken relationship. So I use the instrumental version. But the line “you [can] have this heart to break” is certainly true for me. My heart was Maureen’s and hers was mine. We tried mightily to tread carefully when we disagreed so that we retained our gentle touch on each other’s heart.

We came across this song during Maureen’s final illness. We knew her death would break my heart, but there was nothing she could do. And so her passing did break my heart. We loved each other fully through it all. And so it goes.